Sunday, 22 November 2015

Reprogram Your Brain

In Jan 2nd 1995 I attempted suicide. I had over 190  co-codamol, and a bottle of Vodka. I was told there was 10 milligrams in my body and that I should have died, however since i had nausea, paleness, vomiting symptoms that probably helped, they also said the reason i didn’t was because of my tolerance level. Unknowingly i was classed as a Heavy Drinker, however i was a Soldier in the British Army and I was a light weight compared to others.

I spent 6 months in Hospital on all sorts of Medication. As I look back now and I look honestly at the reasons why I did it, I can understand myself better.

The real reason was my self confidence, was the way i thought of myself, the way I acted, and really at the end of it all, who i was.

In the time when I was in the Hospital, it was 24/7 therapy. I quickly realised that I hated who I was and I didn’t want to be me anymore. So I was struggling with me and I couldn’t ever get away from me. I had to find a way through this, or die.

Everybody had known me as Jim, however my birth certificate is in James. I had never used James before, never been called it, was never known by it, so that looked to me to be a clean slate.

I had many sessions with the therapist, and slowly I came to accept James. They actually diagnosed me with schizophrenic because i separated both of them and spoke about Jim and James lol. Honestly, it was the best way that I could distance myself.

To be honest there was nothing in my past holding me there. No one cared about what i was doing or how I was doing it. Me joining the Army was ALL ME. No one else, no outside influences, no parental guidance.

So with this transformation I had in myself, I had a new life to create, one that I could create to my own desire. I knew I was an asshole, I probably still am, but I had to learn to think before I spoke, sometimes that was really hard but I learned to think what i was going to say nano seconds before I said it so that I could make sure it wasn’t a dick answer.

The BIGGEST Problem that has plagued me is memories, you can change but you cannot forget. Memories hurt, smells hurt, certain sayings sound familiar and they hurt, someones look seems familiar and memories come back. I wanted more control over that, i wanted to change how it made me feel.

At the time the only solution I could find was Hypnosis. I bought them all, self hypnosis tapes, then cd’s then mp3’s lol that just shows you how many over time. I listened to and still do Tony Robbins and similar inspirational people. However it wasn’t far enough for me.

In Germany we went to one of the American PX’s, and I came across a Medical Magazine, it was talking about your brain as a computer, if you change the program you can change the outcome.

THAT FASCINATED me because I understand computers and what they can do. Imagine your brain as a computer that could be reprogrammed. How cool would that be. That took me on a detour into America in the 1960’s where a lot of the information stemmed from, then that took me into the British Army and WW2 and how they thought the same way.

Check Out The Secret Brain System Here


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